Jason Maxiell Stars in “The Wrath of Bizarro”

Dwight Howard has a twinkle in his eyes and a million dollar smile capable of winning over an entire metropolis with ease. He’s tall, handsome, well-mannered and built in a mold similar to that used in the creation of Greek’s ancient gods.

A high school manchild-turned-NBA man’s man, Howard wasted no time becoming one of the best young big men in the galaxy. And fresh off a first round victory against the Toronto Raptors, he’s ready to prove it. In other words, even your very own mom would blush at the opportunity to invite this man for dinner, not because he’s faster than a speeding bullet or more powerful than a locomotive, but because Dwight Howard is Superman.

Now meet Jason Maxiell. Though it took him four years of college experience and two more buried deep in the bowels of the Detroit Pistons depth chart, Mad Max finally found his way into Flip Saunders’ esteemed rotation. He isn’t tall, he doesn’t smile a whole lot, his arms are long enough for mid-mission spaceship repairs and, unlike the Man of Steel over there, his muscles don’t look like he stole them from an action figure.

If you’re familiar with the DC Comics universe, Jason Maxiell is Bizarro Superman, an inverted replica of regular Superman. If you’re not familiar with the DC Comics universe, Jason Maxiell is simply the reason the Pistons have the best second unit in the NBA.

On Saturday night the Orlando Magic found themselves in the Palace of Auburn Hills up against a team coming off five consecutive Eastern Conference Finals appearances. It appeared as though the Magic would continue to ride the 20-point/20-rebound machine into this second series after it had worked so effectively against a Raptors squad just days prior.

But then the game happened and the Pistons walked away on top 91-73. For the bulk of the first half the two teams fought valiantly, tooth and nail, but it wasn’t long into the third quarter when a couple of key turnovers in conjunction with some heady play from Rasheed Wallace helped seal the deal on Orlando’s Game 1 fate.

Though the Pistons never truly found a way to shut down Howard until Wallace took over from Maxiell late in the first quarter (more on that later this week), Bizarro’s best bet for defeating Superman on this night was on the offensive.

As Howard started strong but quickly faded throughout the game (finishing with just 12 points and eight rebounds), Maxiell did just the opposite. With two points in the first three quarters and a poor defensive showing against Howard early on weighing on his shoulders, Maxiell found himself on the court, up seven points, to start the fourth.

Though the Magic finished the third on a 9-1 run, coach Saunders stuck with non-starters like Maxiell, rookie guard Rodney Stuckey and reserve center Theo Ratliff; and with Howard on the bench to start the quarter it paid off.

Quickly into the final frame Maxiell attacked Magic big man Martin Gortat for his fourth point of the game, eventually followed by his sixth, his eighth, a pair of free throws and then his twelfth on a bizarre bounce that only follows shooters with confidence. He finished the game with 12 points, nine rebounds and three blocks.

As far as historical performances go, this certainly wasn’t one, but it does go a long way in illustrating the development of Maxiell and the Detroit bench in general. For the first time in years the Pistons can turn to an army of reliable reserves and it’s spearheaded by their oddly shaped, out of control dunking machine, most famous for his tendency to eat babies; the exact opposite of Orlando’s Howard in every sense of the word other than the explosively powerful low post game they both share.

But while Dwight Howard dons his cape, carries his entire franchise, delivers dramatic monologues alongside Chris Paul and cleans up the streets while he’s at it, Pistons fans can sit back and watch as their own nasty power forward helps coach Saunders plot Superman’s demise.

It’s good to be bad.

Photo Credit: Icon Sports Media